Research that Benefits Children and Families—Uplifting Stories

The topic I chose is the effects of foster care placement on young children and how to help them.

I decided to choose this topic as it is dear to my heart. I have met several children who were faced with the foster care situations. For some children it was for a short period of time and for some it was for a long period of time. I have seen the emotional roller coaster ride they had to go through. I currently have two children who are placed in foster care families. One is with relatives that she knew before and the other one is with a family that is total strangers for him. He is having a very hard time these days. Sometimes I wonder: do I want to be a foster care family some day. My own family thinks it is a great Idea but they believe that I would have the hardest time letting go of the children because I get attached to little people easier than to the adults. 

I have done several readings regarding the foster care system and how it works but it is still confusing to me. There are over 500,000 children in foster care today and two out of three children get to reunite with their families at some point and others have to wait for the adoption or for permanent placements. The numbers of families who are ready to open their doors and hearts for the foster care have gone lower in past ten years but the relatives who came forward to be a foster parent or a foster family has increased.

Most of the times the children are removed from their families due to situations of abuse and neglect, severe behavioral problems in the child and/or a variety of parental problems, such as abandonment, illness (physical or emotional), incarceration, AIDS, alcohol/substance abuse, and death.

 In my personal experiences with children and families in foster care, both parties need huge amount of support and resources. Both parties go through tough times at least at the begging of their times together. For the children, they are faced with self blame, feeling unwanted, attachment issues due to what happened, hard time with the loyalty towards the birth family and not for the foster family, hard times figuring out which house or person is safe or not safe, helplessness due to not having any say on  the decisions regarding their lives, and  not being sure about the future are some major issues.

For the families, it seems like they do not know much about the individual children, what kinds of issues they are already faced with, how to help them with the situations, how to create the bond/attachment, not having much of a clear picture of how much time consuming is the creation of bond with a child who has gone through a lot in life. 

I imagine the positive contribution(s) would be,

  Having the knowledge and the resources available for the children and their families as well as the educators to know how to work with each individual child keeping frustration out of it or at a minimum level should be the goal. If there is a better understanding of what the children are going through and what the signs are that the families, educators and community will notice before it gets accelerated would be helpful to every one. How to help the children before it gets accelerated is the best. It would be much better than having a four year old in the backseat having a kicking screaming melt down on the way to the school and not knowing what to do about it is a scary situation for any adult. Having disruptive behavior irrupted out of nowhere in the middle of the group time and feeling helpless is also not the way to handle it.

  I hope that this study will make a major positive contribution to the well-being of children in foster care and/or their foster care families regarding finding support and resources in the community where they live as well as motivate more families to be involved with the foster care system by opening their hearts and doors to the children who are in need of foster care.

Resources:
http://www.aacap.org/cs/root/facts_for_families/foster_care
http://www.fosterparents.com/articles/index87nacac.html

My Personal Research Journey.

This journey is exciting as well as tough for me already. There are so many topics that I love to learn more about by doing my own research, even though I understand how hard it is for me to find time and energy to do so. I am an educator fascinated about the brain. I wished to learn more about the brain development. But for this course, the second week assignments are connected with the first week assignments. So I have to go with the article I chose in the first week “shyness and emotion-processing skills in pre- school”. One of my subtopics is what shyness is.

 

I am a shy and quiet person by nature until I get comfortable with the environment that I am in. Most of the people that I know do not believe this as they consider me as a chatty and social person. Every year I get to meet children who are shy by nature. At the beginning of the school year they are shy and later on they open up. But there are children who are shy and quiet year around. So I am taking this opportunity to learn more about the subject so I can better serve the children.

Shyness or social anxiety is something that almost everyone relates to. Some children and adults have to deal with this more than others. Due to social anxiety people face lower self esteem, poorer educational and work outcomes, and isolations in life as well as depression. In most cases, early treatments could prevent these problems.

There are several reasons for a young child to be shy. Family interactions with the child could be a reason for him/her to be shy. When the child has negative interactions with the mother it mostly costs the shyness in young child. Sometimes the children outgrow their shyness with growing up. But family, caregivers and educators in the child’s life have to know whether it is going to outgrow with the age or whether the child needs help. If the child needs help with social anxiety then it is better to start it at a young age. Cognitive behavioral therapy is one way to help a child. One of the children in my classroom is going to start this very soon. He is in the process of getting the paper work completed by his family, teachers, and mental health consultants. When the therapeutic approach is not successful some people have to take anti-anxiety medication.

Here is one resource that I enjoyed reading. Hope that you will enjoy it as well:

Guastella, A.. (2009, March). A Cure for SHYNESS. Australasian Science, 30(2), 33-35 Retrieved May 14, 2011, from ProQuest Central. (Document ID: 1681811841).

http://ezp.waldenulibrary.org/login?url=http://proquest.umi.com.ezp.waldenulibrary.org/pqdweb?did=1681811841&sid=7&Fmt=3&clientId=70192&RQT=309&VName=PQD

My Supports

I do believe, as human beings we are all interconnected. Some may think that they have superpowers to accomplish all their duties, needs, and their goals on their own but in real life it is impossible. We have to understand the importance of our connections to other human beings; others could be older, younger, same age or even young children. They are all important in our daily lives. For me it is the same with the environment of where we spend our day, if that place is contaminated with bad thought, attitudes and clutter it does not support us to be better. My beliefs, culture and attitudes also matter for me to conquer my daily challenges.

When I take a deep look at my own self, the current challenge I recognize is keeping up with the school while attending to my responsibilities and duties as a parent, a wife, a daughter, a teacher, and a friend. The supports I have every day, every moment for my success, I see lots of influences and supports. I decided to go back to school after loosing two of my biggest supporters. They are my own father and my former supervisor. They both kept on encouraging me to go back to school and I lost both of them last year, three months apart due to cancer. It is still a very tough period of my life and I still do struggle with it. One coping mechanism I came up with was honoring them the best possible way I can. But going to school and keeping up with it is impossible if not for my husband’s support and understanding.  He is my biggest supporter regarding everything and anything I do. My mother and my sister are always checking on me: how things are going with school, work and generally life but they are thousands of miles away from me. My dear friends are also my supports, the pillars holding me together at all times.

When I think about work life, I consider my co-workers, the children in the classroom and their families as my supports. Among my co-workers I have my dear friends who are there for me in good as well as hard times. They are my other family. “The children” in the classroom are the ones who create the happiest place on earth at work. They are the reason why I go to work every day energized.  My energy for the day is my family and my children at work. It is hard for my friends to understand why I do not take time off once in a while. But for me it is not necessary.  The families of the children are also my supports; they are the ones who send the children to school everyday. They work with me; they understand the importance of what happens in the classroom. They keep the children in the school.

 I know without these supports in my life, it could take a whole different turn for me.  I do believe in supporting each other. My parents believed in me to let me follow my heart. They supported me on my choices of life while guiding through tough patches. They showed me a lot by example than giving commands and I try to continue the same. I try to make an impact on others lives by being a great support, it can be a few minutes of support to a total stranger at the grocery store or years of support to a family of a child in the classroom. I believe it matters.  

“I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug or just a friendly pat on the back” Maya Angelou

              "My Connections to Play."

Quotes that I feel summarize what play represented for me in childhood.

“It is paradoxical that many educators and parents still differentiate between a time for learning and a time for play without seeing the vital connection between them.”
~ Leo Buscaglia (author, educator)

“Play is the highest form of research.”
 ~ Albert Einstein (scientist)

“Play gives children a chance to practice what they are learning…They have to play with what they know to be true in order to find out more, and then they can use what they learn in new forms of play.” ~
Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood)

“It is becoming increasingly clear through research on the brain, as well as in other areas of study, that childhood need play. Play acts as a forward feed mechanism into courageous, creative, rigorous thinking in adulthood.” ~
Tina Bruce (Professor, London Metropolitan University)

 Pictures of essential play items for my younger self.
                                   



Children playing a game of Cricket.

                                                



Running in the rice field

Swinging time in the fields.

How people supported play when I was younger and/or the role of play in my childhood.

When listening to the children talking about their electronic and technological toys that they play with, I feel that I was lucky to be in a developing country. I did not play with electronic or technological toys. I played with my sister, cousins and neighborhood children in the outdoors. Those were the days full of adventure and care free childhood. Looking at the children of today I feel sorry for them missing out on outdoor opportunities. Including my own, today’s children do not enjoy outdoors as I used to be at their age. I am still an outdoor person in my own way.  In the tropical island where I grew up, everyday was great temperature for out door expeditions. In the fields playing Cricket with boys or playing House with girls or going on an adventure through the rice fields with everyone; it was an everyday, after-homework event in my life.

I thank the adults of my younger days who believed in play. We had a curfew.  We used to check the shadow or surroundings to figure out the time, to return home. We knew well enough to not to break the curfew as the consequence was missing the fun the next day. At that time there was no fear of stranger danger. Everyone knew each other and everyone took care of each other’s children. “It takes a village to raise a child” (African proverb) was a practical matter in those days. The best hands-on learning of what we learned in school took place while we played. For me children learn through play was proven through my generation. It was not just hands on experience; it was life lessons and experiences as well.

My thoughts regarding the role of play throughout my life and the role of play throughout childhood and adulthood.

Looking back at my younger days, I truly believe that my parents and the adults in my life had expectations, dreams and hopes for their next generation but they were much more practical ones. They spent much more time with their next generation and tried their best to give them hands-on experiences on life. Technology was not advanced or easily accessible and that was a blessing in disguise for me. Raising children in the United States, I feel that my own children are missing on major life skills that gained through play. But at the same time when visiting back home I feel that my own nieces and nephews are missing on the same. For me the reason behind is the invasion of the technology that changed the world for better and for worst. With the world becoming a global village, east met the west through television; east fell in love with the ways of west without making any conscious decisions.

Today’s grown ups are adapting to the overwhelmingly busy lifestyles and spending money on materials without a conclusion. For me what matters the most for the children is not the presents, but the family being present for them. I do not believe that we have to go back to the Stone Age, but I wish there is a way for all of us to live life with “moderation” as the motto.

 Children having the opportunity to be outdoors with their families and friends ,and the schools having high expectations but still believing in the importance of age appropriate materials and value of play in young lives would be the best situations in my world. And most of all I believe that  we would be more compassionate towards each other than being competitive against each other. Technology has to be a tool to make life better but not the vehicle that take the humans away from precious human interactions.

My hope for the young with regards to play is giving them back what we have  taken away from them due to the over accelerated educational goals. Giving back the much needed love and care for the children of the global village and letting them grow up to be compassionate with each other with much more human interactions than the various machines that they have in their lives. Parents, educators, decision makers, policy makers and researchers working together and having a better understanding of what is age appropriate practice and why is it matter, and how to practice it through play and fun will be the way to go .             

Relationship Reflection

I believe that the relationships and partnerships are important to every living, breathing human being. We are social creatures and need to have human interactions. That is a part of us from the birth. We come to this world with a cry and goes on communicating till we loose our last breath. For me personally, the relationships are precious. Growing up, everyone thought that I can even talk to a wall if I am alone and I believe that I am still the same. I value human interactions. I am not a much of a technological person, I enjoy face time with people. Relationships can be family, professional and personal for me. Especially, as a person who is living in a place where there are no other blood-relatives around, I take my relationships in my neighborhood, community, school district and the work place seriously. All of these relationships are priceless to me.

       Several people with whom I currently have positive relationships and/or partnerships.....

I am going to look at my relationships and partnerships beyond my immediate family or extended family as they all are overseas. I am paying attention to my personal and professional relationships.

My friendships at work are positive relationships as well as partnerships. They are my family away from home. They are always there for me. It is a bond and a trust between us than a workplace relationship. We do not have much time to interact with each other everyday though we are under the same roof. But we all know in our hearts that we are there for each other. We all take a moment to check on each other during our lunch break everyday, as communication among us matters to all of us. This same rule goes for the families. I do my best to greet any family I meet in the hallways of the building. It does not matter whether they are from my classroom or a different classroom. Face to face communication, with all the families of the classroom is not possible as most of the children use the school buses. Still, a note, news letters, and mostly the phone calls are some of my ways to keep the relationships healthy.

 My friendship with few families that I met through my involvement with local school district is an important relationship as well. . We are working together for the benefit of the children of the district. They are always there for my family. The most important part in our relationships is the understanding of the diversity. Accepting the differences and seeing the uniqueness is most important to us. Even though we are working parents, we are always there for our children. The children also know that they can call any of the parents and they are going to be safe with them.

The ways in which each relationship is positive and factors that contributed to developing and maintaining each relationship...

At the work place, we keep open communication lines regarding life, work, children and much more. We have each others back. We remind each other about what is coming, what is due. We cover for each other in case of an emergency. It is the understanding of our strengths, weaknesses and positive interactions that is very important to us. Understanding diversity is an important factor at work as well since we are serving a diverse community and we have a diverse community at work as well. Trusting each other, keeping the priorities in order, understanding and valuing each other are contributing factor as well.   

    Insights regarding challenges to developing and maintaining relationships that I have learned from my experience over time....

Personal biases are a huge challenge when it comes to developing and maintaining relationships. Especially, when it comes to a person from another culture, I have to admit that developing relationships are not always easy. But I do believe I am quick to get the clues regarding whether people are open minded or not and I do move on. Finding time is another barrier. As family, work and school take over my days, it is tough to find time. But most of my friends do understand the circumstances as these issues are very common in most of their lives as well. Keeping up with relationships are hard, sometimes it is better to give space and move on and let the other person watch from the side,. I always try to understand who I am comfortable with and then build the relationship from there on. My personal experiences give me the opportunity to understand the unwillingness or frustrations of the families that I work with. I try my best to get them comfortable with the program and the classroom first, as I know how I felt leaving my child at pre-school for the first time.   

Special characteristics of the relationships... 

  A special characteristic of all the partnerships that I have is a relationship of kindness and willingness to understand. I do look different and speak different but that does not say who I am. They put time and effort to understand who I am and what I stand for. They taught me plenty about the life in America. They have shown me again and again that they care about the well being of my family and me. This is a common factor in my personal and professional relationships.  

     My experiences with relationships/partnerships, including my ability to be an active, reflective contributor, impact my work as an effective early childhood professional..

As I am working in a very diverse community, my own experiences have guided me in so many ways. One of those is the relationship building. I am pleased with the relationships that I have developed with the families that I work with.  I am not saying that it is easy, but it is less complicated when the basic understanding is already there. I do try to make parents understand that their knowledge of the child is important to the teachers and that their contribution to the program and to their child’s education is highly appreciated. Moreover, I try to get the families involved in decision making regarding their child’s education as well as the policies and standards of the program. I truly believe that family’s involvement in their child’s education has an impact on the child and the family. My involvement with my child’s pre-school education is the biggest reason behind me becoming an early childhood educator.

Quotes about Children

Princess Diana, Princess of Wales "Hugs can do great amounts of good — especially for children."

John F. Kennedy President of United States

A child miseducated is a child lost.

Garrison Keillor
Nothing you do for children is ever wasted. They seem not to notice us, hovering, averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks, but what we do for them is never wasted.

Give Love to the Children

Give Love to the children, Children need love everyday
Give love to the children Guide them on their way
Love's like a burning flame consumes all that stands in the way

Love is the only power on earth to take all the hatred away
GIVE LOVE TO THE CHILDREN set the children free
To make their own decisions then they will clearly see
Love is the sun the moon and the stars love is a golden ring

Love is the one thing the whole world desires be it beggar or king
GIVE LOVE TO THE CHILDREN youth has not long to stay
Love is a long term investment the best you will find any day

Love like the rising sun takes all the darkness away
Our children will tell their children and their children will say
Give love to the children they are our crock of gold
and if perchance they ever stray they will come back to the fold

Give love to the children the children of today
Give love to the children and love will come to stay.
Elizabeth Quinn

Dear Colleagues of 6160,

End of another great course.

Learnt a lot and time start the next.

Thank you for the wonderful communications and wish every one all the best on your journey!

    Some words to remember on the way…

Quotes for the Educators:

“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter”

      Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Baptist minister and civil rights activist

“Be the change that you want to see in the world.”

     Mohandas Gandhi, political and spiritual leader in India.

"Safety and security don't just happen; they are the result of collective consensus and public investment. We owe our children, the most vulnerable citizens in our society, a life free of violence and fear” 

     Nelson Mandela, former president of South Africa 

“You and I have a rendezvous with destiny. We will preserve for our children this, the last best hope of man on earth, or we will sentence them to take the first step into a thousand years of darkness. If we fail, at least let our children and our children's children say of us we justified our brief moment here. We did all that could be done”
    Reagan, Ronald

“Life doesn't count for much unless you're willing to do your small part to leave our children – all of our children – a better world. Even if it's difficult. Even if the work seems great. Even if we don't get very far in our lifetime.”
     Barack Obama

“No problem can be solved by the same consciousness that created it. We need to see the world anew.”

     Albert Einstein

“Insanity is doing the same things over and over again and expecting the different results”

     Albert Einstein

Testing for Intelligence?

For me this is a tough topic to take a stand and write a blog on. When I was going to school in Sri Lanka, from first grade on I had tests. They were unit tests, term tests, and year end tests. Year end tests were to decide whether the child has grasped what was taught throughout the year. At fifth grade all the children across the nation were tested on a national test on the same day, at the same time. Subjects were on languages and mathematics. Then, the same routine went on till tenth grade. At tenth grade all the children of the nation went through a national examination for days. This examination helped with the decision making, regarding the future university education path. University education was and still is totally free and getting in to a university is tough. If you can not make it to a university there are other options. I agree it was stressful, but we did not have a choice, and education was the number one priority and it is still the same. All the national exams are created by the department of education, the term tests are created by the provincial government, and unit tests are done by the schools on their own. Thinking back and analyzing all the opportunities that we had, I cannot blame the system. We even got the opportunity to come to the United State because of the education we received from Sri Lanka. I think, the system is still the same and much tougher. The expectations were clear, parents were involved and dedicated and it turned in to a family affair for thirteen years and beyond. Music, art, performance, as well as sports and chess are part of the curriculum as well. There are many international education systems that are in-place in Sri Lanka operated by the private sector.

My personal view is that there has to be a way to decide whether the teaching methods are effective and whether the children are grasping what is being taught. Every child has their own style of learning and the fear of tests is unavoidable. Educational field has to come up with different assessment systems and have to keep up with them to have a better understanding of what is going on. There should be a way of looking at the whole child and understanding that every child is unique and have the potential for a brighter future. It is the responsibility of educators, parents as well as policy makers to open up all the possibilities for the children.

I read about the 1970’s and 1980’s holistic education movement. John Dewey, Maria Montessori, Rudolf Steiner and many others were considered as the pioneers of the movement. Every child is more than a future employee; every person’s intelligence and abilities are far more than the score on a stranded test seems to be the base. Helping children to find their identity, meaning and purpose in life by connecting to the community, nature, and spiritual values like compassion and peace created the love of learning. When it comes to special needs; accommodating differences and refusing the labeling is the method. There are few public schools, alternative schools and many home schooling families who are inspired by this attitude towards teaching and schooling.

When I read articles, on the subject of holistic assessment for the school age children, I came upon an interesting article on Singapore’s plans to support the development of the whole child and to do some careful planning towards it. They are gearing towards accomplishing this goal by 2016 in primary schools. Singapore is one of the nations in Asia that has the education and technology hand in hand. In 1998 -1999 they had a plan to let every high school child to have a personal laptop computer. It really interested me to read about the changes in attitude towards the education.  I posted the article below for everyone to have an idea.

http://www.thegovmonitor.com/world_news/asia/singapore-to-expand-holistic-assessment-for-more-primary-schools-35527.html

http://www.infed.org/biblio/holisticeducation.htm

http://www.examiner.com/early-childhood-education-in-glendale-ca/benefits-of-holistic-learning-early-childhood?render=print