Who Am I as a Communicator?

This week’s activities were very interesting and informative in total different ways than past weeks. For my evaluations I chose my husband and one of my friends/co-workers. Almost all of the descriptions I received in all three of our evaluations were word to word exactly the same but the scores were different. Perception is a cognitive process through which we interpret our experiences and come to our own unique understandings (O’Hair, & Wiemann, 2009). What amazes me is that how would the understanding of me as an individual got to be so similar in all three evaluations. May be it is due to the computer generated system but still scores I got were different and the descriptions were similar word to word. I understand this is an assignment but as a detail oriented person I am curious to know how did this happen and what is the meaning behind this. Often people can come to vastly different conclusions even in the exact same circumstances. This is because each individual organizes and adapts his or her perceptions into existing memory bases called schemas (O’Hair, & Wiemann, 2009). So this makes me wonder if that my husband and my friend/co-worker have the similar perceptions about me and they adapt me into similar schemas.

In the listening styles profile my listening style has lined up as people-oriented, action-oriented, content-oriented and time-oriented. This basically put the finger right at who I am. I believe that lost time is something that we would never regain in our life time. So I have my own philosophy that I have to better use my time and at the end of the day I need to feel as I have accomplished something. This does not mean that I do not have fun or I put other people to work without letting them have fun. I do have fun and I am the only one who follows this philosophy. “You are empathetic and concerned with the emotions of others”. Yes I totally agree with this statement about myself, because sometimes when people are so strict about rules and not ready to bend a bit depending on the situations it is hard for me to understand why everything has to be black or white and how come there is no chance for gray.

The big surprise for me is the statement I got in the description of verbal aggressiveness scale. “You often resort to character attacks and ridicule when talking to others who do not share your viewpoints. Your aggressiveness may cause anger, hurt feelings and embarrassment, and will rarely, if ever persuade the listener to your point of view.”  This is a harsh statement for me. I have never felt that I caused anger, hurt feelings or embarrassment to anyone. I am not comfortable with any of these words because I strongly believe that no one has the right to make anyone feel angry, hurt feelings or embarrassed. I am not a saint but I try my best to not cross that line. So, now I will have to be extra careful about my choice of words and actions. This is a great learning experience for my own self.

Reference:

• O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2009). Real Communication: An Introduction. Boston, MA, United States of America: Bedford/St. Martins.